:: how jedi are you? ::

Yes, yes...well, this was somewhat inevitable. And predictable. I couldn't be Darth Maul, though. Evil, yes; not the leader, yes; but I am hardly so badass. I'm the slimy guy with the slightly creepy laugh and hissing voice who wears black robes and follows the emperor around and most likely gets killed in some rather demeaning way. (And my name is...Grima Wormtongue! Wait, I'm mixing genres...) No, no...I've never been a Renfield before. Never. 8)

Ok, well, my computer's dead. (I'm somewhere else at the moment, obviously.) It is a truly terrible thing. Now if I want to check my mail or do anything, I have to go up to the ninth floor (don't laugh...it feels like a long way away when you spontaneously want to look something up) and use computers with incredibly noisy keyboards and absolutely gigantic screens that are right out it public. Really, very much not cool. So, I'm really only getting to the computer about once a day...it's just too far out of the way. The problem with this is multiplied by the fact that I have three papers that I have to write before the quarter ends. (The quarter ends in about a week and a half.) So I get to write three papers in the computer lab...with loud keyboards and uncomfortable chairs and no chance to sing while I do so, or even talk to myself. (Not that I really get a chance to do that anyway, thanks to my roommates continual prescence. No roommate next year! Hurrah!) Also, it is really cutting into fanfic-ness. Now I know this is not a problem with most people but I like fanfic and it's about the only nonacademic thing I do on the internet. But one feels very silly reading fanfic in public places. And very soon I'll be home, trying to feel ok about reading it on my family's computer which is in the kitchen, of all places. Right at the point where I've watched enough Highlander to understand what's going on in the fanfic without playing the "learn about the series without watching it" game. Blargh...

And, to make things worse, I am out of reading material but it feels silly to go to the library for just another week or so. Also, I have no time. This has, however, forced me to finish the second Gormenghast novel. And start the third. And read half of the third. In the last couple days. I'm not as into the third one. For one thing, Dr. Prunesquallor is no longer in evidence, being as he is back at Gormenghast and the story is most emphatically not. Also, I read a lot of it before econ today and I was falling asleep and so did not really understand what I was reading. Oh, well.

All right. I'm going to stop complaining now. Fun stuff has happened recently. I went to Folklife and bought jewelry ("I have shiny things!" shouts the crow girl), I got to see an episode of MST3K ("Huzzah!") and I have watched more Squirrel-man than is probably good for me (Highlander...it's because of the episode with the mountain men. Duncan looks like a squirrel at one point. It doesn't really have to make sense.) All of these are good things. If my computer would only work, life would be nearly idyllic.

Apparently, I do exist. Or rather, my blog does. Glad that's cleared up. hehehe.

So...do I really exist anymore? The world may never know. (Wait, no, that's Tootsieroll Pops. Have you ever cut your tongue on one of those? I did and I bled profusely on three of my roommate's kleenex. No one else has apparently done this, though. Maybe I'm just special. Let me tell you, cherry and blood don't go well together.)

(Mr Vandemar: I like blood. And cherry.
Mr. Croup: But not together.
Mr. Vandemar: No.)

::warning - spoilers ahead. because I have to rant and rave somewhere.::

My God, Star Wars rocks! hehehe. Yeah, I saw episode II last night with a bunch of my friends. Rhiannon, Ann and I went to the mall about 3:30 (for the 7:30 showing) because we are freaks in that way, but we were first in line so we got to take whatever seats we wanted. And it was muchly worth it. The movie was so cool. Christopher Lee has force lightning! How cool is that?! I'm very excited about this. (Someday, I really am going to find the movies where he's Dracula...really.) And there were so many cool fight scenes - I like light sabers very muchly. Annakin whines a little, so at least we know that Luke comes by it honestly. The guy who plays him just looks eeevil. Which is good, really, since he will be soon. But really, the coolest thing in the movie is Yoda. Not only does he get good lines ("Master Obi-wan has lost a planet. How embarrassing.") but he has a fight scene! I mean, we all knew that Yoda could whup anyone's ass, but now we've seen it! We have seen it and it is very good.

The only problems with the movie, for me, were a couple of the Amidala/Annakin romance scenes. Now, I have a very high tolerance to cheese but these sometimes went a little far. And, occasionally, the movie hits you over the head with the foreshadowing stick. Really, does anyone not know that Senator Palpatine turns into the Emperor? (If you didn't, don't blame me. I warned you about spoilers.) Do we really need to whack us over the head with the Imperial March music? (Not that I'm really complaining - I like the Imperial March. hehe) But, all in all, very cool movie.

So now we have the foreshadowing stick, the "Luke-you-are-a-whiny-boy" stick, the angst stick, the tactful stick, the moral-of-the-story stick and the "Richie-Ryan-has-no-taste-in-clothing" stick. (Been watching the Highlander tv show. Can you tell?) And we have many generic sticks with which to hit people that do not fall under these categories. And one large fish. Sometimes you have to hit people with fish. Nothing else quite works.

("Circumlocution," said Mr. Croup to Mr. Vandemar. "It's a way of speaking around something. A digression. Verbosity." Mr Vandemar nodded. "I wondered," he said.)

Take the Affliction Test Today!


Which Evil Criminal are You?

la la la...found a page full of quizzes. These were the best ones. Elizabeth Bathory! Vampire, vampire, vampire. hehehe.

I really should stop watching Dark City. It's twice in two days now and I realized that I'd like to watch it again. (Eventually, I should watch it with other people...) I've also realized that I would almost like to forward through certain scenes (ex. the scenes where Emma is the main focus - especially the ones where she's singing. She is so very muchly being dubbed). And that I can do a lot of Daniel's lines with him. And Mr. Hand's. But mostly Daniel's. This can't be good. 8)

The problem with reading the Gormenghast novels is that it is extremely difficult to describe them to people. Most people see you reading and say something like, "So, what's the book about?" (Well, actually, they tend to say "My God, that books is huge!" first, as I'm reading the whole trilogy in one volume, but anyway...) How in God's name do you answer that question with Gormenghast? "Well, you see, there's this really old family that live in this castle and they have these really bizarre rituals and the Count and his wife (who is always covered with birds and followed by an army of white cats) have just had a son named Titus. Meanwhile, there's this kitchen boy named Steerpike, who wants any kind of power he can get really, who is (sort of) trying to take over the place. Also, the Count's serving man and the chef are having a sort of slow-motion duel, the Count's daughter really hates her life and there's a whole bunch of other people with funny names. (Dr. Prunesquallor! Hurrah for the good Doctor!) And nothing really happens for a really long time, but it's good anyway. Then Steerpike burns down the Count's library and the Count begins to believe that he's an owl. And stuff..." By the time you get to that point, the person you're talking to doesn't really want to hear anymore. And they tend to look at you like you're slightly insane. (Which I am, but that's beside the point...) So, since the books are really hard to describe and no one's read them, I can talk with no one about them. I will have to get the BBC miniseries from the library soon and watch it with Katie. That would be cool. Then we can discuss it together. (And I'll get to see Dr. Prunesquallor! hehehe...)

Rocky Horror tonight! Hopefully, a lot of people will come and it will be cool. The last two times I've watched this, I've been the only person in the room who knew any of the audience participation and it kinda sucked. Maybe this time will be better. I mean, they are showing it at night (never go see Rocky Horror at noon. It's a bad thing) and it is on a college campus, so there is hope. We'll just have to wait and see, I suppose.

Well, must go. Irma and Alfred Prunesquallor are giving a party and I have to finish the scene. hehe.

Which RPG system are you?

by Mr. Vimes

Nope, I don't know what it means. I'm not a gamer, really. (Really. I promise.) But it's kinda cool. 8)

i wonder what blue looks like on this template...
or yellow
orange
brown
and grey
I like colors. (Brown comes up as red. And if you spell grey "grey" - with an e - it comes up green. Isn't that interesting?) Of course, if I do find a color for Owl, that would mean she'd want to talk. Perhaps I should stop playing with this now...

I've come to the conclusion that I no longer need to look for fandoms. They will find me. For example, some time last year I was reading a rather good Dracula fic on fanfiction.net (which I've every right not to feel geeky for as Renfield lives in my head. The author, however, refuses to get to Victorian London. 54 chapters and we're still in the Italian Renaissance. What is Dracula doing in Italy, I hear you ask? Go read the fic and find out. It's called Child of Night by Scribe. It's slash...there. You've been warned.) Anyway, I decided to see what else this author had written and it turned out she had a whole X-Files series. A whole bloody series. So I read one of them. And it was really good. And from this, the "Let's see how much I can learn about this show without ever having seen it" game was born. Or Buffy. I was minding my own business, looking for Clerks fic, and there it is - Buffyfic. And when it's right there like that, how can you resist? Well, yesterday, I was looking for Discworld fic (which there is far too little of) and there was Star Wars fic on the site. Not Phantom Menace which I am apparently immune to, mostly because the movie kinda sucks, but original trilogy fic. And I could just hear it whispering, "C'mon Sara. You know you want to. This is what you wanted the novels for - subtext, added depth. And it's not Whiny-boy!Luke. It's Jedi!Luke. You like Jedi!Luke. What can it hurt? And it's just fanfic." As if fanfiction was some sort of hobby and not a maddening overriding obsession that begins to rule your life and warp your mind and allow you to spend chunks of time in excess of 6 hours on the computer without moving. Real world? What is this real world you speak of? (And as I sit here typing this, I wonder why there is not more Gormenghast fanfic. Gormenghast. But really...tell me you wouldn't want to learn more about Dr. Prunesquallor. Oh, wait. You wouldn't. No one's read these books. I'll be quiet now.)

Moving away from the fanfic (sort of), I reached a somewhat important conclusion last night. As a Sherlockian, it has always irked me that I did not know where I stood in this debate, but I have now formed an opinion. Jeremy Brett was a better Holmes than Basil Rathbone. (They showed "The Norwood Builder" on the Canadian channel last night. It was fun, realizing that I am apparently the Holmsian ubergeek in our group as well as the Tolkein ubergeek. And I'm not even that much of a Sherlockian. I mean, I've only read the canon once.) Mr. Rathbone was a lovely Holmes and he has the nose for it, but Mr. Brett had the character down much better in my opinion. And the random yet purposeful movement, the enigmatic smiles, the quick little glances at Watson. Also, he made quite a lovely tramp with a really interesting accent and he looks quite nice with ruffled hair. (I guess we can add him to the beautiful dead men list...) But I haven't gone looking for Sherlock Holmes fic. Mostly because I already know where it all is...

In other news, Owl is coming along nicely. For those of you who are uninformed - and that would be all of you, as I haven't told you - my friend Rhiannon is very into World of Darkness, especially Vampire. As I also know much about this game, though I have never played, Rhiannon has convinced me to create a character. Now, my natural predilictions would lead me toward ghouldom - Renfield: Thank you - but I have no domitor, can't be troubled to create one and Renfield won't let me have his. (Renfield: No! He's mine! And you already do horrid things to him in your head. Just be glad he hasn't entered this blog yet. Yes, Renfield, we're all quite happy about that. Renfield: Except me. Yes, except you. You could go away and play with him if you like. Shoo! Let me finish my entry.) So, I have created an actual vampire. Her name is Owl. She is a Malkavian (they're mad, all of them mad...hehe), schizophrenic and has quite a large lunar obsession. And she's scary. I'm quite proud of her. However, she keeps prompting me to write creepy things in my notes for my classes and I've no idea what she'd get up to here, so I don't think I'll invite her to my blog. Anyway, I'm running out of colors.

("Circumlocution," said Mr. Croup to Mr. Vandemar. "It's a way of speaking around something. A digression. Verbosity." Mr Vandemar nodded. "I wondered," he said.
See? It's not like I could use red for Owl...and that would be most appropriate.
Messrs Croup and Vandemar: No. We get to keep red. We like red.
Someday, it would be nice to be the only person in my head...)

I got to watch Batman last night - animated, dark-'n-creepy, with Kevin Conroy Batman. It was cool. Apparently, they're doing a top 10 sort of thing over ten weeks on Cartoon Network. However, I don't know that I'd have placed last night's in the top 10. It was one of the ones with mobsters and redemption and Batman-as-redeemer. Not bad, but not one of my favorites. I mean, yes, we should have these. It's part of what Batman is - he started out fighting the mob and it's good to see him helping people back toward the light rather than just throwing them in Arkham or the prison (whose name I don't remember because none of the really interesting villains get put there). I just sort of hope that we get some of the real rogues gallery villains in the other episodes - Joker and Two-Face, etc. I'd like to see the Mad Hatter or the Scarecrow, but that's just me. I like the geeky villains and Dr. Crane and Jervis Tetch are about as geeky as they come. I mean, we could play "The Trial" or "Perchance to Dream," which I always thought was Jervis' best moment. Or the first episode with Scarface, which was really creepy. And I'd like to see Harley episodes. They won't be playing "Mad Love" because they're using B:TAS and Batman and Robin rather than the New Batman/Superman Adventures. (Which makes me very happy - I like the earlier animation style so much better.) But we could play "Joker Fish" or "Harliquinade" ("our life used to be so placid, won't you please put down that acid and say that you love me again?) or "Harley and Ivy". Those were all really good. Or "Almost Got Him". "I threw a rock at him!...It was a big rock." hehe. I want to see "Over the Edge" but it's newer. Oh, well. We'll just have to see what happens. Maybe one of the above will get played. We can only hope.

And now I'm back at school. Mom drove me back, which was nice, and bought me lots of food, which was almost nicer. Now I have bagels and chai and orange juice and candy and pocky and gingersnaps and chicken and soda and lots of other stuff. I figure I won't have to shop for anything but basics for the rest of the year. It is very exciting.

Being home was good. My little sister Katie and my Mom now have blogs also. I warn you though - my mom talks about knitting a lot. It's kind of frightening. And I think it's wearing off on me. I now have the urge to learn to knit socks. Then I can make myself new socks that will not wear out so fast, which would be very exciting. I have socks that I just got for Christmas and already they're wearing out! Why is it always the socks you like best that do this? It's really not fair. And the other great thing about being home is that I have my CDs back! Yea!! Except for the Man of La Mancha CD which I lent to Megan (my sister who does not have a blog...yet) and that she has now forgotten about. I imagine I'll get that back eventually.

So now I have music and food and a little bit of money. What more could I possibly need? Possibly to get my roommate and her noisy friend out of my room for a little while...but I will restrain myself and take comfort in the thought that soon I will have a room all to myself. Ah, joy and rapture! hehe.

Yea! Home for the weekend. Being away from college (and annoying roommate) is good. My parents (the ones the 'my dad' link goes to) called me from the produce aisle of the Safeway yesterday to ask if I wanted to go home. They made a point of telling me that they were holding a pineapple at the time. So it is their fault entirely that I was singing Cabaret all day yesterday. And not any of the songs with the Emcee either. (Mmm...Alan Cumming...) But home is good.

Went to the library yesterday. Almost got Star Wars novels, but could not remember if the ones I was told to get were by Zahn or Kahn. (Is that not an amazing coincidence? And doesn't the second one make you want to think about Star Trek? hehe) I tried the Kahn ones as they seemed to be set during the actual movies, rather than afterwards, and that's what I wanted. Unfortunately, they sucked. I mean, really, really sucked. It was just a novelization of the movies and we all know how bad those can be. And there were just too many little tiny characters that the author felt he had to try and introduce all at the same time. After a while, it feels like it's just turning into a list of names. Especially in Jabba's palace. Did you know that the little rat monkey who sits near Jabba has a name? Why does he need a name? And especially a long and interesting sounding one like "Salacious Crumb". That sounds really cool but the character does absolutely nothing. It is annoying. I felt like I could write better than that author and I know I'm a bad writer. Just look at what I've done to poor Renfield over the years. Renfield: Yes, pity me, please. Anyway, I guess I'm just really disappointed. I wanted background information, indepth motivation. Not a summary of what I've already seen on screen. I guess that I want movies based on books rather than novelizations of movies. Oh, well. I did learn that the Hutt part of Jabba's name referrs to his species. I always thought it was some sort of title. Maybe some of the other novels that aren't based directly around the movies would be better. Marc was telling me about a part in the books where Luke actually does turn to evil after infiltrating somewhere by apprenticing himself to an evil Jedi. I want evil Luke! He wears black all through the third movie and is slightly creepy - why can't he be evil? Just for a little while? I like Luke on the Dark Side. I guess I'll have to keep looking. Blargh...

("Use the control panel, Luke. That's what it's there for." - Thumb Wars.
Renfield: My God, you have geeky friends.
Messrs Croup and Vandemar: No one lets us talk anymore.

I did it! I got a single room for next year! I have triumphed! BWA HAHAHA!

All right, I'm ok now. But there are just so many wonderful advantages to this.

• I can decorate however I want (beautiful dead men on the walls and not a trace of pink)
  
• I can listen to my music out loud
  
• I can listen to recorded books
  
• No one will watch TV when I want to sleep
  
• No one will watch reality shows at all
  
• There will be no bodymist. (My current roommate wears so much of the stuff that some of my friends literally can't enter my room)
  
• The genes that make me eternally cold will be pampered
  
• I can get up early on weekends, make noise and not bother anyone
  
• I can talk to myself in my room
  
• No one will bring annoying, obnoxiously loud people that I don't know into my room
  
• No one in my room will ever be concerned because I have been talking about cannabilism, decapitation or other similarly morbid topics
  
• Et cetera
  

It will be so marvelous. I'm so very very happy about this. I was bouncing up and down last night. hehehehe...

In other news, the Star Wars obsession is not really fading, so I may have to look for novels at the library tomorrow. Yes, I'm sure you all wanted to know to what depths of geekdom I can sink. I can sink quite, quite far. (But I suppose that's the point of watching a geek - you're all here for the freak show, aren't you. Let me see if I can find some live chickens.)

(Renfield: For those new to carny lore, a geek is traditionally one who bites the heads off live chickens or rats in a freak show. Such exhibitions are now illegal. More than you needed to know, eh?
Mr Vandemar: I like rats. And pigeons.)

Do you ever find yourself randomly quoting Shakespeare? One of my roommate's random construction-paper hearts fell off our door and a snarky little voice in the back of my head said, "If it be worth stooping for, there it lies in your eye. If not, be it his that finds it." Argh! Must...not...become...Malvolio. Would much rather be Feste.

(No roommate next year...la la la...)

So, Return of the Jedi last night. Dude, Star Wars rocks! hehe. Was muchly fun. There were these very enthusiatic guys in the audience who started cheering as soon as Lando blew the Death Star and we were all having so much fun that we joined in. Death to the Empire! It was cool. It's really fun how you can watch Luke grow up over the course of the films. He's so annoying in the first one, but by the time you get to the third, he totally rocks. (I am restraining myself...I will not go find Star Wars novels...today. We'll see how I feel when I get to the library on Friday.)

I had a revelation during the movie. They're a questing party in space. (Too much time with gamers, yes?) We've got our roguish hero type (Han Solo), his warrior buddy (Chewbacca), the hero's spunky love interest (Leia), the semi-annoying comic relief (C-3PO and R2-D2) and the shaman/wizard (Luke). The hero saves the day and blows stuff up, while the wizard has a psychological debate with himself and ends up not going to the Dark Side. Questing party in space, man.

Is anyone else bothered by the fact that 3PO is "fluent in over 6 million forms of communication" and seems to have a bad British accent in all of them? You'd think a language droid would be better at such things.

Also, do you think that everyone in the Empire's army thinks that they're evil? Obviously, the Emperor and Darth Vader do. They practically sit around saying, "Man, we are evil. Eeevil. Yeah. And we like it. Bwa haha!" But you have to wonder if their army thinks the same thing. Maybe the army's just kind of like, "Yeah, you know those Rebels are annoying. They're messing up our governmental system (which is not great, but the best we've got.) They're probably not bad people, but they need to stop messing with us." How many of the Storm Troopers do you think have those kind of views? General Tarkin, though. He was evil. Peter Cushing! ::bounce, bounce::

I can see why Darth Vader keeps his helmet on all the time. He looks like Humpty Dumpty without it.

They're showing Phantom Menace tonight, but I don't think I could handle that - going from a really good Star Wars movie to a really bad one. Besides, I'd miss Star Trek and Wolf Lake. heheh. Werewolves...yea... And it's room signup night! I will have a single next year! No annoying roommater! And I can decorate however I wish. I will put my beautiful dead men all over my walls. Bwa hahaha! It is a good plan.